Writing for Fun
October 2018
The Experiment - Maureen Rampersaud
‘I’m going to do a bit of an experiment, Terry, my man.’
‘Are you, Bob? What’s that then?’
‘I’m going to trip over a pothole in the grass that Her Majesty’s Prison Service have neglected to attend to. My experiment is to see how much I can screw out of them for my terrible injuries.’
‘But, Bob, there aren’t any potholes.’
‘There will be soon,’ Bob replied, tapping the side of his nose.
The prison Governor was surprised to receive a claim for damages from Robert Whitely’s solicitor. He had seen the report by Tim, one of his officers, regarding the fall. Tim said that he thought it was strange, as there had been no pothole there the previous day. Unfortunately, the Governor mused, this kind of stunt by the inmates was becoming more and more common. He put the wheels in motion, no way would he let the taxpayer be one penny out of pocket because of this little rat.
Whitely claimed he had suffered an ankle injury, mental trauma and tinnitus as a result of his fall. He wanted £50,000 and his solicitor’s costs, estimated at £30,000. In court, the investigation team were able to establish that the natural slight undulation in the grass had been tampered with. During cross-examination, the not too bright Whitely admitted that his tinnitus was a long-standing condition.
The Judge ruled against Whitely, who was ordered to pay the Prison’s legal fees, as well as his own. He was also given an extra six months on his sentence for attempted fraud.
Bob sat, staring into space, when Terry walked by, chuckling, ‘How did the experiment go, Bob?’