Writing for Fun
April 2015
The Telephone Cold Call - Reg Pound
The ringing of the 'phone startled her. She had just settled down to read the latest book of the book club to which she belonged. An unusual club, the 'Coffee Break Short Story Club'. They mainly read from the 'Quick Read' series of books, and met at the Utopia coffee shop.
She put the book down and before answering she picked up the alarm kept nearby. This alarm, at the press of a button, would give a loud piercing whistle; enough to deafen an unwanted caller.
Mostly though she didn't mind cold callers and enjoyed the cut and thrust of the conversation. In fact such callers usually gave in first when she persuaded them to buy raffle tickets. Being an agent for a Charity she received a £1 for every £5 book she sold. The alarm was only a last resort.
She answered the 'phone.
'Hello?'
'Hello, that isn't you, is it, Liz?'
Not a voice she recognised or the usual sales pitch she was prepared for. She was intrigued.
'I don't know who you want but you are right, it isn't Liz.'
Having expected a cold selling call, getting a pleasant sounding but confused voice was, if anything, a nice surprise.
'Oh, no. I'm really very sorry. I thought I was ringing my sister. Obviously you are not she. Her voice hasn't got that nice Irish lilt you have.'
'Thank you. I'm sure if I had a brother I would like him to be as complimentary as you.'
Were they flirting she thought? 'Anyway, you seem to have the wrong number.'
She could have put the 'phone down but he, whoever he was, sounded someone quite pleasant and as she was feeling a little lonely this evening; even a conversation with a stranger was a nice distraction.
'Yes. I suppose I have. Liz has only just moved into the Southend area, an 0I702 exchange number. Have I got that right or am I ringing somewhere miles away. Ireland perhaps, in view of your accent?'
'No, the area is correct for the exchange. Why don't you ring enquiries, they should put you through.'
'Ah, that's the snag. I don't know Liz's new address. That's one of the things I was ringing for. I think I'll just have to wait until after the weekend when she's back at work on Monday.'
'Well, I'm sorry I can't help.'
'And I'm sorry to have disturbed your evening. You must think we are a dozy family.'
'Not at all, it could happen to anyone. Goodbye and good luck. I hope your sister soon settles in to her new home.'
She goes to put the 'phone down.
'Hi, wait a minute,' he shouted.
She stopped herself just in time. 'Yes, what is it?' she asked.
'I know this may sound rather strange, but I was going to take Liz to the Saturday matinee show at the Cliffs Pavilion tomorrow as a surprise moving house treat. As I can't get hold of her until Monday, may I give the tickets to you and your partner or friend. It would be a shame for them to go to waste. I could leave them at the box office for you to collect.'
She was taken aback and hesitated, before replying, 'Well, eh, yes, eh, that's very nice of you, I'm not sure. I don't know though I am at a loose end tomorrow, but I don't have a regular partner at the moment and it's a bit short notice to find someone to go with. So thanks, but no thanks.'
There was a few moments silence. Then he spoke again. 'I know, it's a bit cheeky but as you are doing nothing and neither am I, would you mind coming with me? It's only a matinee so should finish in time for any Saturday evening plans you may have.'
She paused for a while before replying, as she doodled on a message pad.
'No, thanks all the same, I,' she took a deep breath, 'Yes, why not? Thank you, it's been a while since I've been to the Cliffs. It'll be quite a novelty.'
'For me too. I'll meet you in the foyer bar at 2 o'clock if that suits you. Let's not suggest any identification. We'll just see if we can pick each other out.'
'If you say so; fingers crossed that it will not be too much of a surprise for either of us. Until tomorrow then. Goodbye for now.'
He put the 'phone down. As usual his background work paid off. He'd known her name, 'phone number, and address before he made the 'wrong number' call. She lived in a rather luxurious apartment block in Westcliff, so should be ok for a bob or two.
Before they met he needed to decide his identity and why he needed £30,000 cash immediately. With skill and luck his tried and tested formula should work again.
She put the 'phone down. That was a piece of luck. Just as she was thinking it was about time to find a new companion, a promising one comes from out of the blue. No need to trail through her usual sources of Conservative, Golf or Gaming Club members to commence her fresh enterprise.
The last enterprise had been a failure. The post-mortem had found 'Death by natural causes' - a heart attack - the carefully arranged fall was not an accident. The insurance would only pay for accidental death; still, better luck this time.
They each retired for the evening looking forward to their meeting next day, and to a forthcoming increase in their finances.