Writing for Fun
February 2015
The Curious Incident Of The Character - Reg Pound
'Hello.'
'Hello back; who are you?'
'I'm a character.'
'What do you want?'
'I would like to appear in one of your stories.'
'I'm not sure about that. I don't know anything about you.'
'What do you want to know?'
'Well, name, age, appearance, education, interests, achievements; will do for a start.'
'My name is Michael, but as to the rest, can't you just write me in and let the reader work all that out for themselves. I thought one of an authors golden rules was 'show don't tell'.
'It is, but I have to know that a character's characteristics will fit into my story.'
'Ok, but why don't you just start your story and see how I turn out? After all you are the author. You can have me be and do whatever you want.'
'Very well, but I haven't decided on a plot yet.'
'Yes, and I think I may be able to help you there. You do know that characters are supposed to help the plot along, so you could just leave it to me and any other characters.'
'No, I don't think so. Would you please go away. I should like to devise my own plot and not be told what to do by any of my characters.'
'That's fine; if you think you can manage without me you'd better get on with it. Good luck'. Damn. Damn. Damn. Damn. I've nearly run out of paper, broken a dozen pencils and still nothing comes to mind.
'Hello.'
'Oh it's you again. I thought you were going to leave me alone.'
'I would do, but you haven't written anything and it's been over a week now, so I've decided you could do with some help.'
'How will you do that?'
'I'll help you with characters. After all I am one, so I can give you some firsthand information and once you've got your characters a plot should follow and then you will have your story.'
'Go ahead then, help me.'
'First of all give your character a limp.'
'Why?'
'To intrigue the reader. Until the character is developed the reader will not know if the limp is as a result of some deformity or an injury. And if an injury, how it was sustained. The limp could be the central feature of the plot.'
'Good idea. III do that, thank you.'
'On the other hand, let's forget about the limp. It may be a better idea to have a character who is indecisive and could never make up his mind.'
'I'm not sure I could do that.'
'There you are, its working already, you are undecided aren't you?'
'Thanks to you I'm not getting very far. But I now have a story. Shall I read it to you?'
'Yes please.'
* * *
The Curious Accident Of . . . A Character
'The title's wrong.'
'No it isn't.'
'If you say so, it's your choice, just get on with it.'
Michael stood halfway across the road on a pedestrian crossing. The lights had just turned red before he started to cross. He hesitated as to whether he should risk dashing the rest of the way, against the lights, as traffic was coming fast towards him. He did, but the pain in his arthritic leg slowed him down and he was hit by a heavy lorry. The result was fatal.
The End.
Well that was only a short story but I managed to get rid of him. Who wants a troublesome odd character trying to dictate how to write a story, they only get in the way of a plot.
'Hello.'
'Oh, no. What do you want now? I thought I had killed you off.'
'You did. What about writing a ghost story. I could help you with that now.'