July 2013
The couple made their way across the heather, they were making their way towards the Loch. He told her he was a bird watcher and had heard that a bird that was a rare visitor to Scotland had been seen and said he wanted to tick it off in his twitchers' hand book. He also hoped to take a few photographs if it was possible.
'Come on Margaret keep up. Once we have done this we can get on with our holiday,' said the man to his new girl friend.
'It's alright for you, these shoes are not made for walking over hill sides,' said the girl.
Eventually after more grumbling from her they arrived at the place where he said that the twitcher's hotline said the bird was expected to be found. Across the Loch could be seen the buildings of the Submarine Base nearing their completion but near at hand there was no sign of the bird. The couple settled into the grass hoping that the bird may turn up.
'Careful with your muddy shoes don't wipe any of your mud on my Clothes Peg. Clothes Peg,' laughed the man.
'Clothes Peg,' he repeated, thinking he had just created one of the greatest jokes of all time with the name. 'Clothes Peg,' he repeated under his breath.
'All my life I've had to put up with that! I thought it was childish when I was a five year old and I haven't changed my mind. My name is Margaret, not Peg, Peggy or even Peggy Sue,' said the girl in a manner that indicated that she wasn't amused.
'Come on Margo we may have seen the bird. Let me take some photos of you for the album,' said the man trying to change the subject but at the same time trying to show he was his own man by using the name Margo.
He got the camera out of his back pack and thought about the picture he intended to take.
'Stand here, Margaret. You know I've only known you for a short time but you really have such a beautiful face particularly when you smile,' said the man taking photographs of her with the Submarine Base in the background.
'Will you take some of me standing where you are' continued the man.
'Okay be quick as I'm fed up with this outing and it looks like it's going to rain in a minute, let's go back to the hotel,' said the girl as she took a picture of the man.
'Okay let's go,' said the man packing up the camera.
Meanwhile across the Loch.
'Can you see them Sergeant?' asked the officer.
'Yes Sir they are up there just to the left of that patch of heather,' replied the Sergeant handing the binoculars to the Captain. 'A few moments ago they were taking pictures of the Base'.
'l think that we should have a few words with them, they may be the people we have been told to expect. Alert the snatch squad, I'll tell the Major to inform the civil police,' said the Marine Captain.
'Sir,' replied the Sergeant smartly.
Within a short time they were climbing on to a lorry and setting off to get as near as they could to the couple.
Meanwhile up on the hillside the two were returning to where they had left their car.
'Come on try to keep up, Margaret we could get really soaked by this drizzle. The sooner we are off this hill the happier I'll be,' said the man.
'The next time you bring me out looking for a bloody bird, find yourself another bird. I'm not a twitcher,' replied Margaret regretting that she had signed up for such a trip to Scotland, but also knowing she had to come with him.
The two arrived at the car, Margaret wet and generally unhappy. They got into the car just as the lorry with the Marines arrived. The Marines leapt out of the lorry and quickly surrounded the car with their rifles pointing directly at the couple.
'Get out quickly. Get out. Get out!' shouted the Sergeant pointing his pistol at the man's head. 'You two are coming with us, Corporal bring their car'.
'What have we done we only came here to look for a bird, you ask her,' said the man.
'You can tell that to the Major,' said the Sergeant gesturing with his gun for them to get on the lorry.
The party then set off to return to the Submarine Base. Where the couple were unloaded and taken to the Security Block. The Major who was head of security was waiting to interview them, before he spoke to them the Major took the camera out of the back pack.
He gave the camera to the Sergeant telling him to get the film developed ASAP. The Sergeant left the room leaving the man and the girl with the Major and Captain.
'Who are you? What are you doing here? Have you come to spy on the Base?' asked the Major in a stern voice.
'We came here to photograph a rare blue bird up on the hillside, you ask her,' replied the man nodding towards the girl.
'I'll get to her in due course. I'm talking to you. I know you are a spy and when I've finished with you, you'll be very luck to ever see your mother land again,' said the Major.
'Take her to another room, Captain,' said the Major pointing towards the girl.
'I'm just a simple bird watcher up here on holiday with my girlfriend. I was told that a particular bird was seen quite close to here so I came,' replied the man.
Just then the sergeant knocked on the door, 'Sir the photographs are ready for you to see.'
He brought them over to the desk and laid them out in front of the Major.
'Very nice photos of your bird, I can't see anything of the feathered variety though but the photos of the base look quite good,' said the Major very sarcastically.
'But they are of me and my girl, the base just happens to be in the background just by chance,' replied the man.
'I'm satisfied you are what you say you are, but I suggest you keep away from bird spotting in this area in the future,' said the Major, his attitude to the man had softened.
'Now I'll speak to your girl friend, just to make sure,' said the Major.
'She doesn't know anything, she doesn't even like birds,' replied the man protectively of his girl friend.
'Look after him sergeant. Then bring the girl in,' said the Major.
After a short time the Sergeant came in with the girl and she sat down in front of the major's desk. 'Sergeant will you go and bring the Captain in as I want witnesses to what I have to say,' said the girl.
The Major nodded thinking the girl didn't want to be left alone in this situation.
The sergeant left the room as he was requested and returned with the Captain.
'What's your name, you are really in trouble, you'll be lucky if you ever come out of prison. If it was left to me I'd shoot you right now,' said the Major standing over her in a most threatening manner, using the interrogation techniques he had learnt on a recent course.
'For the sake of this interview my name is Margaret Chesterman and you are Major Hargreaves, and I know all about you. You are married with twin children, you have been in the Marines for fourteen years, your wife is staying in Portsmouth at the moment as you don't want to disturb the children's schooling as they are coming up to their 11 plus. You drive a Jaguar but you prefer to ride a motor bike but your wife won't let you. You have a mortgage with the Bristol and West that you have used to buy a house that you are renting out. I also know just as much about you in detail Captain. Do you want me to go on?' asked the girl, taking over the room.
'Who are you? what are you doing here?' asked the Major.
'Major I'm from one of the MI's and l have come here to investigate some security breaches that we have detected from this base. I now believe that we have tracked down the source of the leaks,' said the girl turning to the Captain.
'Major why did you let the twitcher go free?' asked the girl.
'I was sure that you and he were what you said you were and could see no reason to keep you from your holiday,' said the Major.
'No, Major you know he is working for the KGB, the Blue Bird code word told you that. I was just his cover but what you didn't know was that I am a spy catcher,' said the girl.
'Sergeant give me your pistol,' continued the girl.
Then pointing the pistol at the Major she said, 'Major you are our traitor. You are under arrest.' Turning to the Captain, 'Please make a call to London on this number and as my name is Margaret; my boss thought it funny to give the password of 'Clothes Peg' for this investigation, tell him we are about to hang this pair out to dry.'