August 2010
"What, your John?"
"Yes."
"What happened?"
"He came home from work, had dinner, then he said I’m leaving you."
"I thought he was joking so I said, 'Ok, bye'."
"He said 'I’ll just finish this drink then,' and he did and he went."
"The rotten bugger. Why?"
"Oh the usual. Some blond bimbo from the office, legs up to her armpits."
"So what did you do?"
"Wel1, he phoned to say they were going on holiday and he wanted me out of the house by the time he came back."
"What a cheek. You didn't go I hope?"
"Yes, I did, my parents were in their place in Portugal so I went and stayed there."
"Did she move in?"
"Yes but not for long because of the smell."
"What smell?"
"You know how John likes his gadgets, so we had all those electrical things all over the place plugged in to three plug adaptors."
"Yes, I remember that."
"Well I unscrewed all the adaptors, and stuffed them with bits of cat food. After a time the smell got really bad; they had the whole house fumigated, but nothing. So she insisted they move out. He said I could keep the house as long as he could take what he wanted."
"So I suppose he took everything?"
"Yes, everything, including the three pin plugs adaptors!"