Writing for Fun
August 2019
The Loser - Gerry Miller
Andrew grimaced to himself as he staggered and walked away, they were all still laughing but however long he chose for this to go on he was not really getting used to it. The group called after him ‘loser, loser’ but staggering as though drunk the tramp just raised his hand and waved. He had noted an ace of diamonds tattooed behind each member’s ear, Andrew chuckled to himself, ‘how idiotic was that?’ clearly as his informant had told him. Again his mind went round and round in a circle, he had debated this issue so many times. Yet over the last couple of years these debates with himself left him with no other solutions, he loved his job. He smiled to himself and thought of the training unintentionally provided by his grandfather; he had lied to each and every one of his family and friends with the exception of Andrew himself.
Andrew saw his reflection in the shop windows as he shuffled along; there he was a filthy dirty tramp, hugging what appeared to be a bottle in a paper bag. His clothing reflected the persona he had adopted for this job. He quite liked presenting as homeless, so disregarded and avoided and presenting as a bit of a loser. The group he had managed to get close to took so little notice of him; in the pub they sometimes even got him a drink. He had heard them say that as long as he was near them the stink kept everyone else away, no one would ever come close enough to hear their discussions. But today as he sat slouched outside the pub door he had heard them say ‘tomorrow at noon’, the pressure was on. Andrew hated the thought of three weeks stinking work without a result, without a planned arrest he could easily lose sight of the painting. Its stay in Coventry was for one week only starting yesterday. The insurers were nervous.
The times he had seemed to be in a drunken stupor next to them kept the gang amused. He pondered and decided that when he got in he would pour a nice glass of Barolo leaving it to breathe whilst he had a good hot shower to get rid of the aroma. At least he had found out quite quickly that the vague information given now was accurate. He had staked out Birmingham for nothing, thank heaven he was to be spared Leeds, Newcastle and London.
The first thing on getting home was to undress in the hall placing all his smelly work clothes in a bin bag tied up at the door. Then a recap on all the information he had acquired so far. Surely there must be some progress within the wealth of mind maps on the computer. Yet he was worried the final piece of the puzzle was missing.
The small gang that Andrew had left laughing, smiled watched him disappear and then nodded at each other. They each knew that their latest plan was ready for completion, they would never be like the many down and outs they saw around town, and the one they called ‘Loser’ was typical of so many. Ryan and Sarah left the group and walked home whispering low as though young lovers. Sarah knew she was to be the distraction tomorrow and loved her own idea. She also had the sense to realise that meeting the lads later that evening gave her a better chance of staying free should anything go wrong. As was the norm since the target had been identified the couple walked down the High Road through the precinct thus completing a full circuit of the museum before heading home.
Andrew was just a little fed up but having a good shower and his Barolo cheered him slightly but did not help to sort out his nagging doubts. He had followed Ryan and Sarah the two so called art students a number of times and immediately had recognised the target. The other two jokers he had followed on different occasions, Simon had led him to the garage with the freshly painted van. That had been his closest shave, not expecting them to come to the van in the day. Simon and Paul had been so clumsy, whilst promising Ryan they would not go to the lockup anymore; they had forgotten to leave the replacement signage for the van. They knew that could foul up the job completely, Ryan had often joked with them all about ‘hiding in plain sight’.
Just as Andrew stood up from his desk it struck him, ‘what an idiot’ he would have to return to the garage, he had been so pleased that he had not been stupid enough to get locked in. He had not taken time to read the signage placed inside the van. He dressed quickly and using the student next door’s bike, he made it round there and back in just over half an hour. Collecting a half empty tin of magnolia paint left by the landlord in the hall he returned again to the van. Now it all made sense with the latest change to the van it could be placed unnoticed in Robertson’s freight yard. Returning the tin to the hall Andrew washed the paint off his hands and cleaned the handlebars of the bike.
Now he needed to disappear cleanly, his energy levels had returned and with great gusto he cleaned, bleached and polished the flat. Only one rucksack packed lay by the door, almost time to go home for a holiday. Andrew returned to his computer and emailed his boss with the details of the job and most of all where they could sit out of sight by the freight yard waiting for the art robbers to arrive. By morning Andrew had removed the hard drive from his computer placing it in his coat pocket. One last check of the flat and dressed now in his only set of smart clothes he headed for the station, the bag of clothes went into the clothes bank at the supermarket, his hard drive went into the river.
The train went past the industrial estate at about twelve forty five and as he glanced from the window he saw a great deal of police activity and smiled to himself. Even from the train he could see down on the magnolia cross central on the roof of the van. The insurer’s recovery fee would be in his bank that day and Andrew smiled as he thought to himself, ‘The losers are always the ones who get caught.’