Southend U3A

Writing for Fun

June 2016

The Courage to Breakout - Gerry Miller

[A continuation of the Rocky story from March, April & May]

As Rocky stood in front of the faculty photo of his birth mother feelings of panic and nausea swept over him. Jody and Adam moved closer watching as his face changed colour, close enough now they linked arms with him and held him steady. The photo was of an auburn haired woman probably in her middle thirties, she was staring directly at the camera, and she was Research Fellow at the veterinary faculty. Rocky stared and stared and then the three all started to talk at once. Jody stated ‘The eyes and chin are the same but the nose is definitely someone else’s’.

Adam said ‘That staring gaze is Rocky when he is determined.’

Rocky forgot what he was going to say and went across the hall where he could sit down and look at the photo. Now he was here and his goal had been achieved he did not know what to do, can you just walk in on someone and say, ‘Hi there I think I am your son’? How on earth would you prepare someone for a thunderbolt like that? Rocky knew he wanted to go back to his bedsit and talk to his mum and dad, they would know what to do. He felt calmer things just had to be measured and now he could go at her pace, that was if there was any pace to go at.

The gang of three went back to the digs and Rocky agreed to meet up later and tell them what his parents had said. The call was long and emotional Rocky and his mum both became overwhelmed so dad took over, finally his dad came up with a workable solution. Rocky explained to Adam and Jody, as they all again were eating Pizzas, his parents were going to write to Annabel and explain the situation very tactfully, as they could of course be wrong. After several drafts the final copy agreed Rocky showed it to them.

Dear Ms Baker

We have reason to believe that you may be the birth mother of our adopted son Rocky we did name him Richard, but being found amongst the rocks this nickname came so naturally. We have all followed the clues we believe that you left for him sewn within the most beautiful of quilts.

We do not wish to cause you any trouble or embarrassment, nor do we wish to disrupt your life or any family you may have now. Rocky has grown strong and handsome (at least we think so!) and would love to have his birth mother in his life. We also would be happy to share Rocky with you and hope you will become as proud of him as we are.

Of course if none of this makes any sense to you and/or you do not wish to have any contact please let us know.

With anticipation

Mary and Tom

And so the letter was posted, a cloud of expectation surrounded them all. Fretful nights and lack of concentration followed. How long was reasonable to wait, and worse of all, what if they got no reply at all. Rocky went back home and his mum set him tasks to keep him busy. At last though it seemed for ever, in real times it was only six days when the reply arrived.

Dear Mary, Tom and of course, Rocky.

Thank God that you have found me and that you would wish to meet me and include me in Rocky’s life. I have waited for this time ever since that church door banged behind me. I left my heart with him. I have tried to work hard to be a credit to him after my terrible abandonment of my only child.

I have a home near Woolaton Hall which is the large deer park in Nottingham, please telephone to make arrangements; we can meet at my home, if you think this is appropriate. I know there will be many questions but there is freedom to walk in the park and for us all to have any time out we need.

If you would wish to meet me on my own without Rocky at first I will understand.

I look forward to hearing from you,

With eternal gratitude and best wishes,

Annie (Annabel Mary Baker)

And so the call was made, Mary decided to lock herself in the bathroom so that at least she could allow both herself and Annie the space to cry and sort themselves out without Rocky and his dad fussing. Arrangements were finally made and on the following Saturday, armed with a large photo album (Rocky’s task as set by his mother) the family returned to Nottingham and found their way to Woolaton Hall and the Keeper’s Lodge.

It had been a Saturday when the letter had dropped on Annie’s mat; stunned shocked and startled Annie sat at the kitchen table and sobbed. Her thoughts were running rampant and her feelings churned inside her, her body were racked with nausea, at last her hopes and dreams were to be fulfilled. Now a new determination set in Annie had important things to do. Showered and hair washed and dressing carefully she went out, bracing herself she strode off to the big house.

Ian had been home just a day when looking up from the kitchen table he saw Annie walking purposefully towards the back door; his heart stirred she looked as beautiful as he remembered. In the last eighteen years she had clearly avoided him and he had caught but a few glimpses of her in the distance. The door barged open as Annie burst in and with a sudden outburst of words she told him to come out and walk. His startled mother stared at both of them and screeched at Ian, ‘Ignore her, it’s business; she has come to see me.’ Taking a gulp of air she turned on Ian, ‘Go to your room.’

Ian stood up laughing at his mother as he finally broke out of the chains that had bound him for so long. ‘Mother I am thirty seven, I am sick to death of your controlling behaviours, your interfering and bossy ways have driven me nearly insane, why on earth do you think I don’t come home often? Haven’t you ever thought about it?’

His mother’s discordant voice rang out at them, ‘I told your father she was not good enough for you’. Annie stood there face white and mouth agape then Ian reaching out grabbed her hand and they went out into the gardens.

They walked in silence hand in hand to Annie’s house. Annie and Ian hugged and cried, suddenly Annie came to her senses – she had been down this road with Ian before. Ian was sat at the table and watched Annie as the kettle went on. Annie sat opposite Ian and started to talk, Ian watched and stared as Annie’s story unfolded. Annie at last took breath and refilled his mug with tea, the letter from Tom and Mary lay on the table and Annie passed it over. ‘Ian you need to take your tea to the garden bench digest what I have told you, read this letter very carefully and then decide what you want. Annie went upstairs and watched Ian from the bedroom window, her heart still surged with love; there had never been any one but him.

Ian sat on the bench and read the letter through and through more than a dozen times, he knew this child was his. He was the father of an eighteen year old son. Annie had kept this secret for the last eighteen years, Ian’s mind flashbacked. That first holiday from uni was when she had studiously avoided him and all his knocking on her door. Like a fool he thought Annie did not love him. Yet she had carried their child totally alone, and it seemed this was the first time she had shared her secret. Ian remembered how spiteful his mother had been about Annie. Telling him there were many boys coming and going and he had stupidly listened, he allowed his mum to control who he saw and she and his father had trailed many well-heeled county girls across his path. Deep down he had always known Annie was his only love.

Finally Ian stood briskly to his feet and marched back into the kitchen.

Two weeks to the day later on a bright and sunny morning Annie stood again watching through her bedroom window as a car drew up and parked outside. Her heart was jumping as the doors opened three people got out two adults and one tall gangly young man. She gasped at first sight of her son, tall and handsome and a lot like Ian. Annie fled down the stairs and Ian coming from the kitchen placing his arm around her opened the door. As it opened Tom and Mary stood aside and Rocky came forward knowing his dream was at last fulfilled.