Writing for Fun
January 2015
Life Is . . . - Joan Bond
'Life is twenty years,' said the judge looking down from the bench with a disparaging look upon his face. First thought from Boris, working on half the sentence nowadays, five years off for good behaviour; but I am innocent. I didn't do it . . . well if I did, I didn't mean to kill him.
I was doing a favour for a bloke I met in the pub. When I went in he was sitting there with a black eye and crutches almost crying in his beer. Well I felt sorry for him he looked so miserable so I bought him another beer and asked him what happened.
He said he had been beaten up trying to save his wife from being beaten and raped by this Roughneck and he was losing his mind, unable in his present condition to get revenge on the bloke.
I am a big chap and tough for my age and he asked would I put his mind at rest by knocking seven daylights out of the fiend and he was willing to pay me 500 snots.
I am not usually an aggressive bloke but, always ready to earn some cash, I decided to do the deed. We arranged to meet in the woods that night where he knew the bloke went running; having been pointed out to me I ran after him and gave him what for – maybe harder than needed – but I felt he had needed it. Knocked him out and left him.
I went back to the pub to collect me five 'undred and tell the bloke he could relax now as the job was done, when the rozzers turned up and arrested me – the bloke had been found dead. I explained It wasn't me; I didn't know the guy and what was they goin' on about.
I admit I had plenty of previous but I never killed anyone. But I suppose it didn't help copping the sergeant on the floor when he didn't stop pushin' me.
The geezer swore he had never seen me before and I didn't know 'til later the bloke I knocked about for him was in fact his neighbour who he had been at logger heads with him for years over a byway that both claimed was theirs; and even later it turned out the rape, so called, was the neighbour having it away with the wife – a situation that had been going on for years before being caught out in the process of . . .
I suppose he deserved a bashing just for that so didn't feel too bad but more angered that I didn't even get my dosh!
I had been inside many times so it wasn't too bad. I was reunited with several friends and with having nowhere to live at present it was free bed and board, no worries about the future.
There was a nice little racket going on inside and as Brasso was being freed I soon made myself available to stand in for six months until Brasso was committed again . . . never was out for long.
They say life is what you make it, so I reckoned it was pretty much OK!