Writing for Fun
May 2015
The First Time - Joan Bond
I will always remember my first time. I had been very warm and coddled for months then I popped out into the world and I saw him. Couldn't take my eyes away from his lovely smile. 'Hello son,' he said, 'I've been waiting for you to come and learn the trade and take over the business. I thought, 'ang on, either he needs glasses or has lost the plot already.
Mum said, 'Don't be daft, Alf, it's a girl.' Didn't stop him though, I had my own set of tools at three and I could knock a barrow together at four and he still called me Bertie.
Then mum stood up to him and said I had to go to school. I went one day, didn't like it and said I wouldn't go back. Dad said that was ok, but mum added, 'How is she going to work out the length of wood you need her to cut if she don't know her numbers?' He thought about it, agreed and I only worked then in the shed a couple of hours after I got home.
Now me mum was cute with a needle and made me beautiful dresses, all smocking and open pattern work. I wore one when a bridesmaid to Auntie Grace, with a little bonnet in yellow satin and must have looked good as a neighbour asked if I would be a bridesmaid to her daughter if I wore the outfit. This happened several times. I didn't know the people. I must have been a pushy cow already as I kept the page boys up to scratch, gripping their hands and telling them what their duties were.
There were a lot of us kids who played in the street together. I was the littlest so big Tom always made sure I was not in the road if a car came and if I was there when it was time to go home. He had six brothers and sisters to watch over, they lived next door to us, an Irish family and were always poor. I remember they had a party once and bought a piano. Paid a deposit, had the party then sent it back 'cos it wasn't loud enough; even got their money back 'cos their Dad was well known for his ready fist 'up and get 'em' attitude, and could threaten to shoot 'em in the knee caps if they started anything. I was talking about him to my cousin the other night, she is 93 now and was talking about the time she had a gang, all under seven and she was the lookout when they were running around the docks where we lived. She had, and really it was no lie, she had a torch with a red bit of tissue under the glass which she had to flash if she thought the policeman was coming. Mind you if he had caught you in them days, you would get a clip under the ear and sent home.
Which brings me to another first time. I fell in love. I was at school and Alina Dorothy Johnson was the netball captain of the school team. I played defence to her goalkeeper and she was just lovely, but of course so unattainable as a friend. She was two years ahead of me but in the exams they would sit us one each side of the desk in different years so that we couldn't cheat, and I sat with her one year, she gave me a bit of chocolate and I almost saved it to keep but realised I didn't love her that much, so ate it.
Even at my age there are still first times for many things that you never would have dreamt were so rewarding. Tap dancing and being in shows trying to keep up with the company in the routines. Baileys, and being able to write stories that folk actually laugh at. I tell you kids you ain't seen nothin' yet . . . Watch this space.